Give yourself as long as you need to grieve (diagnosis, loss of a body part, lifestyle, or passing of a loved one.) Some may not understand, especially if they’ve not been there, or even if they have.
But time alone is 50% of the healing. You’ve also got to do your part. Make time to journal, pray, mediate, talk with someone, write letters to the person or condition, join a support group or counseling. Allow a space for tears to feel welcome. “Stuffing emotions” isn’t healthy.
You’re not nuts. Emotions bring us to the edge. We’re raw, tired, may feel sad, regret, and anxious. Maybe you feel God abandoned you and/or someone else.
Look at your beliefs. Do you believe something good can come out of this? Whatever beliefs you have for your new life, you will gather evidence to support them. You can acknowledge this is a painful time, and you’re sad with this experience—and you are willing to be part of your healing for as long as it takes.
Part of your healing may include asking the question. “Why?” “How?” And part of your healing will begin when you move away from those questions into questions like, “Now that it’s happened, what will I do?” “What one thing can I do today to bring myself some happiness?” There comes a time to stop looking down at the sorrow, and look up at the possibilities.
—When you do, the sky’s the limit.