If we’re not consciously tending to our garden of feelings and thoughts, we’re subconsciously allowing weeds to take over.
Are you happy? (Yes, you can still be happy in the midst of cancer.) If not, what would feeling happy feel like if it were in your experience right now? Feel the happy, not the not-happy for not having xyz here and now. Do you remember the commercial, “Calgon take me away!”? The scene switched from busy day and loud kids to the woman sitting in her bathtub, where she was “off in some tropical paradise.” Same for you! Don’t focus on wishing the kids weren’t screaming. Focus on “being in paradise.” What’s that feel like?
When I was first learning this type thinking on a deep level, I’d notice at conferences others had an almost supernatural high energy. They’d say they’d never felt better, and were so sad to leave the conference. I enjoyed the events, but never hit the high they did. I brought this to the attention of my spiritual director. She told me, these people were going to conferences for the energy and feeling, not necessarily to live the lessons taught. When these people left the conference they went home and energetically crashed, not having hundreds, or thousands of others who’ve done the work to skim from. By doing your work, you’ll know your feelings. You’d be amazed how many don’t know their true feelings. From feelings come thoughts; from thoughts come beliefs; from beliefs come actions.
By being in the present, we stay in power of our experience at all times. Yes. Got cancer. No. Not happy about it. Yes. Can be happy anyway. This doesn’t mean cartwheels, clown acts, and brushing over the feeling of loss, anger—or whatever. Nor does it mean you’re happy for cancer, but that you can find happiness. It means you choose not to give your power to the outer circumstance (in this case, cancer.)
I invite you to get serious about monitoring your feelings, thoughts and self-talk. Tap into your feelings without kidding yourself. “Oh it’s all fine.” Maybe it is. Maybe it isn’t. I dare say, if you’re in this boat, something has been lurking known—or unknown to you beneath the surface. I don’t believe we always need to know the cause of the situation, but if we’re willing to ask ourselves, a higher power for good, etc. we’ll know the cause if it’s needed for us to heal the cause of a situation. Otherwise, we can still heal without knowing the cause.
When you’re monitoring your feelings, ask yourself, “Does this feeling bring me close, or pull me away from what I want to experience?” If the answer is pulls me away, immediately draw your attention to where you want to be. It isn’t about a fake it‘til you make it. It’s about being real with where you are at any given moment, and making the commitment to do the best you can to get where you say you want to be. If you feel lousy, do what you need to do to help yourself feel better. Saying, “All is well” may be True on a spiritual level, but if you feel otherwise and need anti-nausea medication, it’s not the best time to practice a belief you can’t buy into. On the other hand, affirming “I feel lousy” is no help either. You can feel lousy and find something good on which to focus. (Even if it’s “Hooray, I have anti-nausea medication!”) By doing this, you’re admitting where you are on a vibrational level, and doing what you can to honestly move forward.
Quick! Run! Get a vase for the flower-thoughts! They are beautiful!